Painful Clarity

What is important to you?

If you don’t know the answer look at your bank account, schedule, and relationships. Listen to what you say to yourself and others.

The answer will jump off the page at you.

What do you want to be important to you?

  • Are they the same?
  • Different?
  • Close?
  • Far apart?

Incredible grief and incredible joy coexist in my heart today.

I am grieving the loss of a precious life that should be, but is not. My auntie heart has been shattered into a million pieces and it will not go back together the same. A perfectly formed little boy who was anticipated, prayed for, and wanted more than anything in this world suddenly and inexplicably died days before he was due to make his entrance into the world.

Pain brings clarity.

Now is the time to live, love, and forgive.

Living without regret isn’t reckless. It is in fact the most purposeful thing you will ever do.

You have to pre-decide what you want and then go after it with your whole heart. It is too late when opportunity arises to prepare for what is at hand.

Invest in people and cultivate love, joy, passion, and purpose.

Build something that lasts, no matter what storms come your way.

In the midst of our sorrow, I look around and see a fabric of love, family, hope, and faith that refuses to be unwoven. The grateful heart and peace that my sister and brother have is not an accident. They decided to be amazing long before something horrific happened to them. They stand firmly on the rock despite the waves of grief, pain, and sorrow which crash all around them and threaten to wash them away.

Learn to be amazing before the storm hits. 


Stand firm in the storm of life

Photo Credit

Simon, your Auntie Donloree loves you with a white hot love that death cannot extinguish.

You are a miracle in every way and your brief time on earth has been purpose filled. You have forever changed the hundreds of lives that you touched in the nine months you grew to perfection inside your sweet mommy.

My beautiful Simon’s name means “listen or to be heard”.

What is your purpose?

Listen and hear what you must do on this earth and then execute it without turning to the left or right. Be the one thing that you were created to be. Decide to be amazing and stand on the rock where storms still come but will not wash you away.

Are you listening? What do you hear?

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  1. You have touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes tonight, Donloree! Your message is so strong and so true. I will be remembering your family and especially your dear sister and brother-in-law in my prayers.

  2. Oh DL. I am so sorry. There is no pain deeper for you your sister her husband and your family. 9 years ago my sister lost her baby boy Liam who graced us for a very short time on this earth. My son Brendan Liam and my sisters next baby boy Kieran Liam carry his name. I’ll never forget that beautiful baby boy. I held him in the air in my arms when he was a few weeks old telling my sister he was perfect. And he was. And still is. Godspeed Simon. My heart is with you all in this Time of deep pain.

  3. I’m so sorry for your loss, the world’s loss.
    It doesn’t get easier but the feelings become more familiar – it’s hard to explain. My thoughts go out to you and your family. xo

  4. My heart hurts for you and your family. Keeping you all in my thoughts and in my heart during this difficult time.

  5. This post brought tears to my eyes. So sorry for your loss, Donloree. My prayers are with you and your family xx

  6. I am listening closely this morning. Thank you for this exquisite, searing reminder. Thoughts and prayers to your family.

  7. I am so sorry! Simon is home with his heavenly father. I also have a baby girl Amanda in heaven. They touch so many lives in such a special way. My heart goes out to the all of the family! It is so hard! Praying for all of you!

  8. Gulp-smacked. I am so sorry. Truly sorry. Life is fragile. Prayers to you.

    This may not put you in a better mood, and it may not offer a new perspective on the day or the situation. But what I describe below actually happened and has profoundly influenced my life.

    A guy I once worked out with, and his mom has been a client for years, had quite a day a few Saturdays ago. Chris is now a pilot in the Air Force. He’d flown B2 bombers but got reassigned to the drone program at an Air Force base near Las Vegas. Chris is a great triathlete and competes all over the country.

    A few weesk ago he was on a training ride 20 miles or so outside the city of Las Vegas on a bleak desert road. Suddenly was hit from behind by a drunk woman driving a pick-up truck with a fenced off bed. In the bed were a half dozen goats. After the woman hit Chris she saw that there were no witnesses so she just took off back to her ranch — never even stopped.

    In the hit, Chris shattered, and I mean shattered one ankle, and severely broke his leg. He had a severe concussion and a laceration on the back side of his head that went from ear to ear. He blead a great deal. He was probably unconscious for a while, but only came to when the goats started licking the blood off his head and clothing.

    You see, what the driver did not realize, is that after she hit him, his body actually bounced up and landed in the bed of the truck. The goats in back broke the sound of his fall. When she got to her home, another 20 miles or so out of Vegas, she got out of her truck and went into her house. When she did, Chris somehow managed to get out of the bed of the truck, crawl to a nearby home and get help from 911. The lady was arrested — her 3rd DUI, and Chris is now at an Air Force Base hospital in Las Vegas where he will eventually be released to take leave in here Fallbrook for a while.

    No punch line here Donloree, that actually happened. The woman had virtually left him for dead, or so she thought. As a bicycle commuter, this has been haunting me since I found out about it a few weeks ago. Anyway, the story takes a final tragic turn. Last week, after the woman made bail, she killed herself.

    I’ve been going through some tough times these days. This tragic story that ended in bitterweet fashion has helped me keep my perspective even if it can’t make me see the joy burried deep in my own life. Trying though, still trying…

  9. This post hit home…painful clarity indeed.
    But I am learning to live life with no regrets and move forward….and surround myself with people who know my worth….Thank you for the reminder.

  10. Oh I’m so sorry to hear this awful news. I’m crying for your sister, you, and all the rest of the people who’s lives Simon touched. My condolences. :'(

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