What WAS I Thinking?!

I love opening the mailbox and finding actual mail. Not bills, flyers, or ads. Real mail – letters from friends, packages, or postcards that are just for me and no one else. Last week I opened my mailbox to find an odd shaped letter that was hand addressed to me. I immediately got excited. Someone sent me something special!

As soon as I got into my condo I ripped the envelope open. Turns out it was a CD of the pictures from my competition. Not really personal mail, but exciting nonetheless.

Suddenly, my mouth went dry and all the excitement drained out of me. I did not want to look at the pictures and in that moment I would have been more than fine with losing the CD forever.

It took me five days to gather the courage to put the CD into my computer and look through the 65 or so pictures of me in a bedazzled bikini. Criticisms, shock, embarrassment, and bewilderment ran through me faster than a pack of cheetahs. I could not believe what I was looking at – me in a bedazzled bikini wearing five inch heels on top of the world with a muffin top.

What WAS I thinking?!“, kept running through my mind. Then I remembered that I wasn’t thinking. I was too busy being. Too busy being fully me and choosing to live out who I truly am to worry about a bit of a muffin top.

Looking back at the pictures with that in mind, I saw the absolute beauty in the pictures and my eyes and heart welled up with tears of joy. How quickly we forget the importance of loving who we are and fully stepping into it. How quickly we forget the fullness that comes from being who we were created to be.

Be fully YOU today and don’t think about it.  Just do it….or better yet, just BE it.

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  1. my dear you were completely gorgeous on the day of your competition. you fit in entirely with all the other half-naked, bedazzled, super-tanned hard bodies. there were NO muffin tops there!

  2. I love your blog and motivation. This is so true. I have lost 80 lbs and cannot tell you how many times I beat myself up over my problem areas I see in the mirror. I forget how far I have come and should be proud of my accomplishment and progress instead of dwelling on what is left. My goal for the day will be to be fully me today. Thanks for the reminder.

  3. Your accomplishments to date are beyond incredible. You are such an inspiration. I’m so grateful to get to be in connection with you again. Doubt is faith in the enemy. Lose it… for good! You are FABULOUS!

  4. NO MUFFIN TOP ! You’re beautiful inside and out! 🙂

  5. I’m sure the pics are awesome. You are a real inspiration, girl. Don’t forget that.

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