Then there are other things that I am thankful for, but don’t remember to be thankful until something happens.

Today, I am thankful for bras.

Now, I know there are some women out there that don’t think they need to wear a bra, but I disagree.  Please make sure to wear one in public at all times.  Use this rule of thumb: If you need a purse, you need a bra!

While out shopping for clothes, I lost part of one of my favourite earrings.  Despite all the searching imaginable, which included 3 sales people, I couldn’t find the rest of my earring.  I left the store with new capris and one less earring.

Later that day, I felt something poking me in a very awkward location.  Lo and behold it was the earring.  It has been lurking in my bra all afternoon!

Not only do bras support, they keep track of missing objects. Like a good woman, they can multi-task for hours without blinking an eye.

I wonder how many bra-less women have lost one of their favourite earrings, which could have been avoided by merely wearing a bra.  Something to think about…or not…

There are things I do which I find quirky, but may be more normal than I think.

• I put important things that I don’t want stolen in my underwear drawer.  For instance, I just tucked my passport away next to my bras because somehow this makes perfect sense to me. Perhaps I am giving thieves more credit than they deserve.  In my heart I think they will be respectful enough to not rummage through my unmentionables while robbing me blind; thus protecting the most important things in my house.Maybe I should just get a safety deposit box…
• I think the organization of a woman’s spice cupboard and how clean behind her fridge is tells you exactly what kind of woman she is. My spice cupboard is jammed full of things that aren’t even spices.  Heck, I have a smoke detector in there!

How can you find anything in there?

But I have this spice rack…so does it mean I can pull it together when absolutely necessary?

Perhaps my spice redemption?!

My fridge appears to be just fine from a quick glance.

What a happy little fridge; complete with pictures from the nieces on it.

But upon closer inspection, I’ve really let myself go!

Oh. My. Gosh. I can't believe no one told me how far gone I was!

This is why I will pull the fridge and stove to clean behind before people come over instead of dusting.  Then when they use this litmus test to see if I am a good woman I will pass with flying colors and the dusty pictures and lamps will go without notice.  Right?

• I put peanut butter on almost anything.  Bananas, any sort of bread product, apples, ice cream, Nutella, a spoon, a hunk of chocolate, vegetables, you name it! Some days I find myself standing in front of the open refrigerator with a jar of peanut butter in one hand searching for something worthy to pair it with. If nothing can be found I resort to eating it off a spoon.

• One of my life goals is to be able to masterfully bake a soufflé.  I don’t know why but it seems to be one of those things that separates the girls from the women.  And you never know when a soufflé emergency should arise…if called upon in such an emergency, I would want to be able to save the day.

Am I the only one?  Please tell me it isn’t so!

There are many things in this world that just don’t make sense when it comes to women.  I know that I am a woman, but it still doesn’t mean I understand.

• Why do some women find it appropriate to go without a bra in public?  Rule of thumb – if you need your purse, you need your bra.
   
• Nylons.  What group of women thought that these were a good idea when they first came out?  If they didn’t buy them back in the 30s when they were invented, we wouldn’t have to be tortured today.  I just can’t wrap my head around how they became popular…
   
• I am also shocked at the amount of momentum that a pair of nylons picks up when they start to fall down.  They pick up speed at an exponential rate, especially when you are in a meeting full of men.
   
• The collection of items that a woman apparently needs to make it through the day is huge!  Hence the large purses, but how many of those items does a girl actually use?  I know many days I just use my car keys, but still can’t leave the house without my purse. 
   
• Chocolate is needed all of the time.  If a girl is happy, sad, frustrated, discontent, blah, ecstatic, or in love chocolate is part of the equation.  This is why someone invented the chocolate buffet, they knew women would come in droves even though it makes them fat.  The man that came up with this idea is brilliant!  Chocolate makes my pants tight and when I feel sad about how tight my pants are, I eat chocolate to feel better.  Women are trapped in such a vicious cycle of chocolatoholism – is there a way out?
   
• A woman may have 2 pairs of red mary jane heels, 3 pairs of red flats, and 4 pairs of red boots, yet if they see a cute red platform heel it still comes home with them some how.  When is enough enough?  It’s really not clear when it comes to women and their shoes…
   
• Women are constantly reading men’s minds and deciding what they are thinking and feeling before they are able to get a word in.  The poor men are in trouble before they knew what happened, and most times they aren’t thinking past the hockey game later that night.  Why don’t we learn?
   
• If your man has been trained to give the appropriate response to, “Do I look fat in this?” the answer will always be, “No honey, you look amazing and gorgeous.”  Why does the answer make me feel good every time, even though I know he may lying and I possibly look like an elephant crammed into a tutu?

Women are complex.  There aren’t any clear answers…even if you are one! 

Every Tuesday and Thursday morning my alarm goes off at 5:17 am.

Every Tuesday and Thursday morning I press snooze twice and am late for the ridiculously early morning run.

Every Tuesday and Thursday morning I get dressed in my work clothes, throw the cold weather running outfit in my gym bag, and run out the door with a granola bar in hand.

Every Tuesday and Thursday morning the in shape running women are forced to wait 3 – 8 minutes for me to quickly change into my running outfit and grab a drink of water. They are very nice. They have never said anything about my propensity towards lateness, although it must be severely annoying. I know this because I annoy myself almost every Tuesday and Thursday morning, and if you annoy yourself it’s got to be pretty bad.

So I came up with a plan to stop annoying the running women. I laid out all my running clothes and put my work outfit, shoes and accessories in a very cute green tote bag. I was NOT going to make anyone wait for me this day. Nope. I was organized.

I got up at 5:27 after only one snooze, drank a tall glass of water, had a multi-vitamin, and took some time to make toast. I was able to have such a leisurely morning because I was just SO dang organized. Everyone was pleasantly surprised at the lack of a crazed clothes changing event that took place this morning.

After surviving the early morning run, I grabbed the cute green tote bag and pulled out my work outfit to get dressed for the huge day that loomed ahead. While getting dressed and chatting with the other women I suddenly had a small moment of panic. Did I remember everything I needed for the day? What if I forgot something??!  Some days I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which meant I had to dump out all the contents and see what was missing. To my absolute horror, something was missing, something that every girl needs, something that is non-negotiable. I forgot my bra.

There are times in my life when I can’t keep the panic to myself, and I announce my latest fiasco to everyone. This was one of those events…suddenly all of the women in the change room knew of my current crisis.

DL – “Oh. My. Gosh. I decided to be prepared and very organized last night. But I was so organized that I didn’t put my bra in my bag. How is that even possible? A girl needs a bra in her day! My gracious.”

*Huge pause in the change room*

DL – “Well, I guess I’ll just have to go home and get my bra, nothing like being late for work. What am I going to I tell them, that I forgot my bra? All the men in the office would really like that one! Can you only imagine how that conversation would go? ‘Hey there….It’s Donloree here. Yup, I am just running late, need to go home to grab my bra…hope to be in around 8:45…’”

After many unhelpful suggestions, including to just go without a bra, there was an actual solution – even if it was unexpected and strange.

Cathleen – Do you want to borrow a bra? I have an extra in here.
DL – Uh…no, that’s ok. I mean, it’s kind of weird, don’t you think?
Cathleen – No, not at all. I have a ton of extra things in here for such an occasion. The worst thing to forget is your pants. Now there’s something you absolutely can’t go without!

I took a quick look at the clock and saw that it was 7:58. I had to be in work in 2 minutes and still didn’t even have a bra to wear. The situation was getting quite dire…what’s a woman to do?

DL – Ok…only if you are sure and it’s not totally weird.
Cathleen – Nope, here you go. Just give it back on Thursday. Remember, there was that one day I forgot pants, now that was quite the day!

All the women laughed as I announced that Cathleen is the most prepared running woman in all of history. Then despite my hesitation, I put the bra on, hardly filled the thing out, and called it a morning. I did what I had to do to be at work on time.

Now I know that pants and a bra are an absolute must! This is definitely something that everyone woman should know.