Life is not a spectator sport.
To win at life, you have to suit up and get in the game, train hard, show up and keep standing up up when you get knocked down.
Life is meant to be lived, grabbed onto, savored and enjoyed.
I often have this conversation, which I hate ….
Random Person – “I wish I could do that. I could never do that.”
Annoyed Donloree – “Sure you could. You just have to start. You can actually do pretty much anything you want in life. The only rules are the ones you create.”
Random Person – “No. Never. I just can’t … you can, but I can’t.”
Annoyed Donloree – “Everyone starts somewhere. If you don’t start, you never will. Just start. Choose to be ok with being horrible and then keep going. It eventually gets better and suddenly you’re doing things. I promise.”
Random Person – “I just can’t …”
Once you’ve decided that you can’t, it won’t work, it is impossible, you’re too old or there is no way forward, you are correct.
Fearing failure and not trying is failure realized.
The art of showing up.
98% of the battle is showing up. Truly. A year ago I would have never thought I would be a woman who could run medium range distances of 25km and longer without calling a cab to rescue me.
I just kept showing up to the early morning run groups and putting on foot in front of the other.
When I was 22 years old with a completely irrelevant Bachelor’s degree in hand, did I imagine I would be an HR Director and Executive Coach? No. Showing up to work on time and working hard and with purpose moves the needle even when you feel like you’re standing still.
- The hardest and most important thing you can do is show up. Don’t pre-select failure for yourself.
Can’t vs. Don’t Want To
Actions tell you and the world what you actually want; words can be a cheap smoke screen of misdirection when we aren’t ready to be honest with ourselves and the people in our lives.
The worst person to deceive is yourself. Instead of saying you wish you could do, be, achieve or have something, be honest with yourself and the world.
It is refreshing to hear someone say, “No. I don’t want to do that.”
Learn to show up for what you want in life and be honest with what you want to fight and sacrifice for in life.
- Does running an ultramarathon sound like a neat achievement? Sure. Heck as if I am going to trade that many hours of my life to be able to hang that medal around my neck while eating a post race banana or twelve.
- Do I want to be amazing at mountain biking? You bet. This is why you will find me on my bike after an exhausting day at work, practicing single track trails previously ridden with the Dirt Girls. The many bruises I earn are happily covered in arnica while I smile with happiness.
- Do I actually want a hot bikini body? No. I don’t want to count macros, eat 50 or less carbs a day, be unable to play hard and enjoy sports and not be able to think at work. Happy and healthy is way better than hot.
If you want to, then just do it and don’t care at all what people think. And if you don’t want to, be honest with yourself and be ok with saying you don’t want to.
Be willing to try and fail until you succeed; whatever you do, don’t fail by not showing up for yourself.