Today is the first day of 2013 that I feel slightly alive.
Its Saturday morning and I find myself sitting quietly in my office, looking out into the murky darkness of the morning, and drinking my second cup of coffee.
Most of 2013 has been spent either in bed or in a flu and cold medicated haze. I have only done the things I have absolutely had to do and spent the rest of the year inspecting the back of my eyelids.
- I don’t know the last time I was this sick.
Apparently getting the flu shot would have been a good idea. For some reason I don’t usually succumb to the annual flu, but this year my flu arrogance got the best of me.
10 signs you have the Bubonic Plague-Loree
- The grocery list given to your husband only has four items on it – cough drops, cold and flu medication, kleenex with lotion or aloe vera, and chicken soup.
- Naps are required after getting up to go to the bathroom, showering, and refilling your water bottle which only leads to more trips to the bathroom – a vicious cycle.
- Your abs hurt from the coughing fits which cause your whole body to go into spasms.
- Wearing socks that are good up to -40, long underwear, and a toque under all the blankets in the house doesn’t stop the shivering even though sweat is rolling down your forehead.
- Your neighbours wonder if you got a Canada Goose for Christmas because of the intense honking noise that comes from your condo when you blow your nose.
- Brushing your teeth once a day is a huge accomplishment.
- Upon waking up from your sixth nap of the day you are unable to open your eyes due to them being glued shut by flu mucus.
- Talking is avoided at all costs because it leads to an ab workout coughing fit and the Canada Goose-esque nose honking.
- Sitting upright to email your co-workers and clients takes all your energy and an hour rest on the office floor is required before you head back to bed.
- Shamelessly drinking NyQuil straight from the bottle is done morning, day, and night.
I get a false start for 2013.
Needless to say, I am halfway through January and the only thing I have gotten rid of is the flu. It is time to line up at the starting line and give my challenge another go.
Onwards we go!
Now that I can do more than cough, sleep, honk, and intermittently shower its time to give 2013 another kick at the can even if it is slower than I would like.
But first, I feel a nap coming on…
Did you get the plague this year? How do you keep sane while being unable to do anything?