Maybe You Just Don’t Want To…And That’s Ok!

We often talk about the things we ‘can’t’ do.

Our conversations are filled with self created facts about how constrained we are, what isn’t possible, and all the obstacles that make the things we want to do impossible.

Even the most inane things that are easy to fix are sometimes deemed to be impossible, just as a conversation with a woman in the grocery line reminded me this morning.

DL – I love your watch! Wow, it is sure fabulous and cute. Matches your shoes perfectly. Awesome!
Woman in the Grocery Line – Yeah, its nice but I am going to have to stop wearing it because I have wrist problems. It hurts a lot to wear it, like a lot. I think I have carpel tunnel or arthritis in this wrist. I am in constant pain.
DL – I am so sorry to hear about the wrist. Pain is never fun…couldn’t you just wear it on your left arm?
Woman in the Grocery Line  – Nope.
DL Why not?
Woman in the Grocery Line  – Watches go on right arms. I can’t wear my watch on my left arm. If I can’t wear it on this arm, well then, I am doomed to go without a watch.
DL – So you can’t wear you watch on your left arm because…because you have decided you can’t? I don’t mean to be ridiculous, but you really could wear it on your left arm. Don’t you get to make the rules about how you wear your watch?
Woman in the Grocery Line  – It just can’t be done. I will have to endure the pain in order to know what time it is.
DLOk…but you should really know that you COULD just wear it on your left arm. be on time, and no one would judge you for it.
Woman in the Grocery Line  – *harrump* How would you know? You don’t even wear a watch.

Seriously?

Obviously it was more important for this woman to complain than to know what time it is.

excuses

What is important to you?

Photo

I cannot even begin to tell you the amount of times people have told me, ‘I could never do that…’, especially when I was training for a bodybuilding show. I also get this response when I talk about running my own business, speaking in front of crowds of people, writing a book, going to India and working with Mother Teresa’s Missionaries of Charity, catering a wedding, and a myriad of other crazy things I have done over the years.

The truth is, you just don’t want to and that’s ok.

Instead of excuses, we need to find a way to do what we want in life. And if you don’t want to do it, be honest with yourself. There is no shame in not wanting to do something.

In fact incredible freedom is created you’re up front about what you want to do with your life.

What do your self declared obstacles tell you about yourself?

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Comments

  1. Before we retired from teaching school it was amazing how often people would go on and on about how easy teachers have it… only work from 9:00 to 3:30, all summer off, etc, etc. but the moment we suggested that they ought to go back to school and become a teacher themselves, their immediate response would almost always be “Oh, I couldn’t possibly do that!”

    • There it is! It is so funny the things we tell ourselves. Why don’t we just admit that we just don’t want to? Wouldn’t it be refreshing for someone to finally say, ‘Oh, no thanks. I am not at all interesting in doing that….not one bit!’

  2. I so agree! I hear that a lot when it comes to running. Someone, upon hearing that I am training for my 7th marathon, says, “oh…I could never do that. Maybe if I were younger.” I reply that I ran my first marathon at age 41. I will often hear more excuses from these 37/38/39 year olds about bad knees etc. LOL.

    Btw, my husband has a bad finger on his left hand from injury. That didn’t stop him from wearing a wedding band ON HIS RIGHT HAND. That woman’s excuse was pretty silly. Oh…and I wear my watch on my left arm.

    • Yes, I really did want to shake her. I merely nodded, took a deep breath, and turned around. I always hear about people and their knees! Start stretching and doing something about it. When I start to give them some advice to relieve the pain and be able to do what they want, suddenly they are really happy with their knee pain. 😉

  3. Yikes! I tell myself that I can’t cook or I’m not creative and then boom! I move past those self-imposed obstacles and I create. Thanks for this post.

  4. Oh gosh, I can’t stand people like this! I hate when people have BS excuses that don’t even make sense.

    Speaking of your book, I’m setting aside some time to read it today! I don’t have an e-reader so I have to read it from the computer and I just haven’t had any free time to do so, but I promise I will get back to you in the next few days 🙂

    • Oh the crazy people and their ridiculousness. Slapping her silly seemed like a bad idea, so I merely stepped away. 😉

      No worries about the book, read at your leisure!

  5. Sable@SquatLikeALady says:

    GREAT POST! I see this so often, especially with my clients. It seems like they think they should want to lose weight, so they say they want to lose weight but their hearts aren’t in it. At all. I may have to direct them to this post =)

  6. No shame in admitting you don’t want to do something – I LOVE that as I’m experiencing a bit of that in my life right now and YES…..coming to that conclusion/decision is SO LIBERATING!! Makes me wonder why this simple realization took me 30+ yrs to grasp! Fear of the unknown and/or fear of change, I guess, but man, does it feel good!

    Hope you’re well, Donloree!
    Jami

    • Does it feel great to be able to freely say, ‘No thank you. I don’t want to do it.’ As a child, I was really good at this, but something happened as I grew up. It feels amazing to be free enough to say want I want and then DO it. 😀

      And yes, I am very well! I hope you are too fabulous woman!

  7. Aren’t you supposed to wear a watch on your left arm? Oh no! I’ve been wrong all these years!

  8. Great post! So true!

  9. Donloree you are absolutely right! I am one that can get into the rut of saying “I can’t” when in reality is I don’t want too. I am going to make a goal for myself not to say that anymore and choose to say “I just don’t want to”. 🙂

    • Love it! Now when I say, ‘I can’t’ I take a moment to ask myself if that is true or not. It is interesting the things I say sometimes. Oh how funny we are. Being able to say what I want and do what I want with MY life is an amazing thing.

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