Permit me to tell you a story…
Once upon a time there was a girl with a crazy name who grew up with loud, audacious dreams in her heart. A fiery determination and cheerful disposition marked her life.
In the midst of her ‘I know best’ teenage years she stopped watering her dreams and stated watering the weeds of negativity, low self esteem, and impossibility given to her by people she deemed friends.
A dense forest of weeds grew to the sky and blocked out the sun while she traveled into adulthood.
In an effort to see a few glimmers of light, food, shopping, drinking, and adventure were consumed at an alarming rate. The brightness became more and more fleeting until nothing shone and life was only comprised of browns and greys.
Wandering through the darkness for nearly a decade, she finally tripped and fell head long into a deep and dank ravine. While lying in the mucky blackness contemplating whether or not she should attempt climbing out of the hole, a flash of color winked at her from the corner of her eye.
How could anything be alive at the bottom of nothingness?
A purposeful and larger than life dream with a refusal to accept defeat was still living despite the forest of weeds that blocked out the sun.The roots of this dream burrowed deeper than discouragement, self-loathing, and impossibility could ever hope to go. It lived despite circumstance.
In that moment the girl with the crazy name felt a fire start to burn in her heart, the fire of passion. The seemingly impossible task of clearing the forest suddenly became the one thing she must do, and so she started up the steep cliffs and began anew.
The long lost dream is still alive and worth fighting for. After all, it is her life’s purpose and passion.
I am the girl with the crazy name.
For the past three years I have been taking a machete to the overgrowth of low self-esteem and impossibility mindset and rediscovering who I was created to be.
Out of the ‘being’ comes the ‘doing’
After spending a lot of time thinking, I have decided not to compete again.
It is not Bikini or Bust, its just BUST!
Being a Figure Competitor has insidiously come to define me. My measurement of success has shifted from being the best and most fabulous Donloree on the planet to becoming the leanest and most muscular woman possible.
My dream has never been to become a Pro Figure Competitor, despite what I told myself. Achievements mean nothing if you aren’t the woman you have been made to be when you finally earn them.
I have bigger, crazier dreams growing in my heart.
In order to compete again, I would have to pay with my health, self-esteem, family, and dreams. My body is not cooperating despite the 100% adherence I have given to diet, training, and rest.
The price is more than I am willing to pay.
There is a tale told of Cortez that he had his men ‘burn the ships’ when they discovered new land so they had no option but to move forward and conquer what lay ahead.
I could say, I am not competing ‘right now’, but I need to move forward and be the audacious, dream chasing Donloree that I was created to be.
I require all of my health, family, and self to conquer what lies of me.
Teenage girls need to understand how amazing they are and have help figuring out who they have been created to be. My passion in life is to bridge the chasm of the impossible for them so they don’t have to stumble in the dark and fall to their near death before they come face to face with their purpose and passions.
The bedazzled bikini may be hung up, but don’t count me out of the competition of life.
A few jewels have fallen off and I am taking them with me to shine on as I move forward into the next chapter in my life.
I hope you’re willing to come along for the ride because I wouldn’t have it any other way. You had better believe we are going to be lifting heavy in the gym and life.
It is time to train like a champion; tomorrow requires you to be one.