Today Is All You Get

Yesterday I was suffering from an overwhelming sense of sadness and feeling blue. Over Christmas I ate as clean as womanly possible. I only had 3 shortbread cookies and 4 small pieces of chocolate bark as treats over 7 days of Christmas. After watching everyone share fabulous food around a table while I sat down to the same salad for the 13th time, I nearly lost my mind.

I could barely stomach the once tasty, now bland and boring salad and felt horrific all day. Nausea and waves of sadness kept washing over me, yet I had no reason to be ill or sad.

I did not give in to the temptation of eating to fill my emotional void, but boy did I want to!

This morning I woke up with a renewed sense of purpose and remembered my pledge to being healthy and lean in my mind. It is not easy to lift heavy when you don’t have strong muscles. Today I began to train my mind for the heavy lifting that lies ahead…the heavy lifting that really counts; having a positive outlook on life, learning to overcome emotional eating, and enjoying who I have been created to be.

I stepped on the scale and didn’t let the number phase me, looked at myself in the mirror and refused to assess my muffin top, ate kasha and egg whites for breakfast, journaled my tumultuous thoughts, and went to the gym to train my legs like today is the only opportunity I will ever have to train them.

It takes a lean and disciplined mind to overcome frustration, temptation, and a lack of results despite 100% effort.

There are moments when I don’t want to keep going during my workouts, but when I am finished I want to be proud of every rep and set that I did. I want to be able to say that I didn’t leave anything at the squat rack.

When I step on the stage on April 9th, I do not want even a niggle of ‘you could have trained harder or ate cleaner‘. I will stand on that stage with the leanest mind possible.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JyeDbi-QtCA]

Today is the only day you get, how are you going to use it?

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Comments

  1. Hi! I’m new to your blog and I think it’s great!

    Wow. I feel like you are in my head right now! I’m training for my first competition in August 2011. I’ve wanted to do one forever and finally resolved myself to do it. But I never thought the process would bring out so much emotion and soul searching. I would have never thought competing would be more about mental strength than physical. It’s amazing and frightening to push yourself beyond your fears and hang ups. That may have been a lot but this post definitely spoke to me. Thanks for being so open, honest, vulnerable and strong. You’re awesome! πŸ™‚

    • I know what you mean! When you start you think, ‘well I am going to work out and eat clean and do this’. Then suddenly you are facing all your demons and insecurities head on. It is all about your mind!! I am so excited for you! August 2011 is going to be great! πŸ™‚

  2. I was just going to leave you a response on Twitter, but thought I would do it here instead. I feel your pain with the Christmas goodies and what not going on! Totally okay to ditch…you did an awesome job this Christmas – three shortbread cookies?!!! You’re a machine. You inspire me. Cannot wait to get back to the clean lifestyle and exercise (!!!!) after this baby is out. It’s the steps you take each day – the 13 bland salads at Christmas that are going to get you in that top tier, and not just on competition day! You are doing great DL! πŸ™‚

    • Thanks lady! i guess we can call this the ’13 Salad Christmas’. πŸ™‚ I really do enjoy eating clean more than shoving cookies in my mouth! Thanks for the encouragement. πŸ™‚

  3. I can relate. I know all too well about these bouts of
    sadness. I go out and in. Eat clean. Drop. Eat clean. Drop.
    However.. I want to congratulate you on a job well done. Congrats!
    What you do isn’t easy. I’ve no doubt with your training, your
    reflections, your heart, will, passion and determination that you
    will step on stage with your Project Mind being a Project DO to the
    FULLEST! Thanks for sharing! πŸ™‚

  4. Great video by the way! πŸ˜‰

  5. You are such a constant inspiration Donloree!!! LOVE YOUR VIDEOS!

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