A year ago yesterday I started on the journey towards my first Figure Competition. I finally admitted to myself that I had a dream in my heart to compete and hired a personal trainer. I did not have a glorious beginning. I nearly passed out during my first training session, but it was a start nonetheless.
A year ago yesterday I was a shadow of who I am today. Sure I had 20% more body fat, was not in fantastic shape and couldn’t have done a chin up or man push up to save my life; but more than that I was barely living. I struggled to get out of bed in the morning, hated who I had let myself become, and was on the verge of giving up on everything in my life. I was afraid and felt like I had to constantly be someone who I was not. I pretended to be confident and have it all together, but when no one was looking I was sitting alone in the dark too sad to even put up a Christmas tree.
Through admitting I wanted to compete in a bodybuilding competition and choosing to work towards something,I found myself. I found a woman that is powerful and strong and a life that is rich and full. My journey to my first competition was not just about gaining physical strength. It was about learning to be me, fully me, the way God made me. To become strong emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
Today I am thankful for a year ago yesterday because it marks where I have come from and shows me how far I can go. It reminds me that there is hope even in the bleakest of times and that every person is worth fighting for. And it is more than ok to fight for yourself. YOU are an amazing creature and deserve the opportunity to live life to the full. It may not be an easy journey and cannot be done alone, but it is worth the sweat and sore muscles.
Today I have a Christmas up. Today I am not pretending. Today I am me.
Where are you in your journey? How can you be you today?
**This post is dedicated to Faith Keith who reminded me that embracing your yesterday makes you a better woman today.