Denial or New Found Confidence?

I have 25 days until I reach my goal of competing in my first Figure Bodybuilding Competition.  Strangely enough I can say that without seeing black spots, requiring more deodorant, or breathing shallow breaths into a paper bag.

Denial?

No…I definitely know that I am about to glue on a purple bedazzled bikini, apply bronzer to my skin, and try not to fall over while wearing clear 5 inch heels on a stage.

The largest part of this journey has been an internal one.  There have been many physical changes, but the greatest changes are unseen. Many women technically could do what I am doing, but are afraid to do it.

I was afraid, ok scared out of my mind, to commit to competing but I decided to do it anyways.  In November 2009 the only people that knew I wanted to do this were my husband and my trainer.  I used to look in the mirror and wonder who I was and if I was actually going to be able to do this.

Now when I look in the mirror I see a woman that is a Figure Competitor, not only on the outside but the inside as well.  I am proud of myself for getting past many of my fears and insecurities to be able to do this.  This makes me a winner on October 16th, no matter what the outcome.

I may freak out again and I am sure to be nervous the week of the competition, but I am finally confident.  I am a Figure Competitor.

I also knit on the airplane, wear lululemon clothes in the middle of corporate Toronto, and like to install sinks and toilets.

Just being yourself is sure a lot of fun.

Donloree in Toronto

Off to get some coffee, then explore downtown Toronto until my heart is content.

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Comments

  1. I have an amazing daughter who has always been a wonderful person. I am extremely proud of you.

  2. Brenda Werbiski says:

    Donloree – you are an amazing woman 🙂 Beautiful inside and out!

  3. What was your bodyfat when you decided to take the plunge so to speak?

    I am excited to “follow” and support you through your last few weeks!! GO GET EM!!!!!!

    • I’m getting ’em! yay! When I started out in November I had a fat calliper measurement at my stomach of 46 mm, at this point I am down to 10. (This is my problem area, the rest of my body is cooperating…sigh…) So I lost about 36 pounds of fat and gained about 18 pounds of muscle. I didn’t get my body fat percentage done, but now I sure wish I would have! If you’re going for it, do all the measurements, pictures, and everything like that. You’ll be glad you did!

  4. LOVE the attitude! It’s not denial – it’s CONFIDENCE, girl … and you’ve got it! You ARE a figure competitor. And just standing on stage is the reward. 🙂

  5. SOOOO proud of you 🙂

  6. Wow! Good for you, just incredible. Much of what I read in your posts is many times my very own thoughts about myself. Especially this blog, it really hits home with me!
    Thank you!

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